An epic clusterfuck

A nine to one loss to the San Jose Sharks. A five-game losing streak. What now?

The motherfucking Blackhawks, that's what.

I don't know how to respond to this; really, it's surreal to me that a team, only four points out of first place in its division, could play so poorly against a team that they are supposed to be competing with for one of the top spots in the Western conference. How a team, mere pennies away from the cap ceiling and stacked to the gills with supposed top-tier talent, can concede nine goals in a game, allowing fourty-six shots on goal, while answering with only one? How any group of NHL-calibre players can finish a single game with a combined rating of -18?

After losing a close one last night in Anaheim, not one single player on this team showed up focused and ready to play. It showed, as the Sharks exploited the Flames' barely-there defence and went all Harlem Globetrotters on their asses within minutes of the opening faceoff. This seems to be an ongoing problem with this team, no matter the coach, no matter the assortment of players. I'm not going to make accusations of character flaws, complacency, lack of commitment to winning, or off-ice distractions. All of those things are certainly possible, but petty nonetheless.

Brent Sutter offered up the same old diatribe as he does after each and every unflattering loss; they're embarrassed, he's speechless, there are "issues" that need to be resolved. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that if these "issues" haven't been resolved by the 50-game mark, they're not damn well getting resolved. And that's not Brent's fault; regardless of the "systems" he is preaching, these players know what they have to do, how they have to play, not only to be successful, but to win on a consistent basis. These guys are NHL players. They know what it takes to win, at any level. The problem is, they're not willing to do it nearly often enough.

The Flames have been "embarrassed" far too often for a team contending for a division title and a playoff spot, in my opinion. They blew a five to nothing lead to Blackhawks in October. Lost seven to one on home ice to the very same team in November. Turned in a listless effort at home in a five to one loss to the Canucks just last month. Hell, I found getting shutout one to nothing at home against the Predators embarrassing. This is beyond embarrassment; this is an epic clusterfuck.

How many "wake-up calls" does this team need? At this point, it appears they've OD'd on sleeping pills and the front desk at the hotel is closed. It's up to the players, the leaders, and management to see if they can be revived or not.

It's frustrating because Brent Sutter is not a bad coach, Darryl Sutter is not a bad general manager, and these are not bad players. So how do you explain this team's nosedive into mediocrity, unless they were simply overachieving until now?

I commend Darryl Sutter and Flames management for their ongoing commitment to building the best team possible. He's done almost everything in his power to build a winning franchise, and hasn't gotten the desired results. It must be discouraging to watch the team you thought could compete with the league's best flounder. Cap management issues and failure to address the team's scoring needs aside, he has dragged this organization back to respectability, and it appears that he's done all he can do. I think it might be time for him to move on.

Is a trade really going to fix things, or just act as a band-aid solution? A hasty deal can't be done in order to appease impatient fans. If a trade is going to be made, it has to make sense for the team going forward, beyond the end of this season, and will likely occur at the deadline or the draft. Do we trust the management team's judgement after the way the Jokinen deal turned out? If this losing streak has taught us anything, it's that this team's problems aren't going to fix themselves, that the bounces maybe aren't going to even out over time like people were saying mere days ago, and that even consistent good play can't be counted on to produce results.

We are in a world of hurt here and don't have a glorified history to fall back on. In a small, Canadian market with a hockey-crazed fan base that wants a winning team, what is there to lose? The Flames built on the momentum of one successful season and dragged it on for as long as humanly possible. Clearly, that is no way to build a team that is going to be consistently competitive in the future.

Am I suggesting that the Flames hire a new general manager, scrap everything, and rebuild? No, there are some very good players on this team and others that they could probably do without, but when you're not getting results, changes have to be made, and not just to the coaching staff. Maybe tanking the remainder of the season in hopes for a shot at Taylor Hall or Tyler Seguin isn't such a bad idea after all. Then again, the Flames would probably use their pick to draft some unheard-of centreman with hands of stone because of his "size."

I am envious of Oilers, Senators, and Leafs fans. You know what you're getting, straight up: a shitty team that probably isn't going to make the playoffs. What do we get? A team that parades around like a big tease, looking all shiny and promising and talented, only to prove year after year that it's nothing but a facade. False advertising. And every year we fall for it, buy into the hype, ignore the warning signs, only to have our hearts broken yet again. The Flames are the man-eaters of the NHL.

You'd think we'd know better by now, but alas, our vision is clouded by unconditional love for a franchise with little indication of long-term improvement and/or gratification. Such is the plight of a sports fan, I suppose.

I don't know what the solution to the Flames' problems are. I don't really know anything apart from the fact that, for some reason unbeknownst to me, I love this team and want them to do well. Any decision that somehow facilitates that is alright with me.

Somehow, this post has transitioned from unadulterated anger to quiet acceptance. Funny how that happens.

Chicago on Thursday.

Cheer when they're up, cheer harder when they're down. And boy, are they ever down.

Go Flames Go.

I want Craig Anderson dead

Seriously, how many times can this happen?

Aside from a ten-minute lapse which saw the Avs score twice to tie the game at two in the second period, the Flames dominated this game. They fired fourty-six shots at Craig Anderson and were gifted with a powerplay in the dying minutes of regulation, which carried over into an eventual two-man advantage in overtime, on which they failed to score.

As per usual in games against the Avs, the end result left me with a hoarse voice and the desire to chuck my BlackBerry at the nearest wall, like I did after the loss to Columbus on Friday. I know the Flames aren't exactly stacked offensively, but how can any team accumulate fourty-six shots on goal and only score twice? Yes, Anderson was good. He definitely stole the game for the Avs, but he is beatable, as the Flames proved earlier in the game. He also got plenty of help from the team in front of him, who blocked twenty-seven shots, and the Flames also missed the net on eleven attempts.

They weren't all top-quality shots, and the Flames sometimes appeared as if they were trying for the perfect play or the perfect shot, but at the end of the day, Anderson stopped all but two.

Which brings me to this conclusion:

I want Craig Anderson dead. I'll hire Keith Ballard if I have to.

He looks like a mouse and is too much of a goody-two-shoes to say "ass" on TSN (around the 1:25 mark).

Watching this team try to set up a play or a shot is sometimes painful. Watching the game at home, you can see that shooting or passing lanes are opening up, but the players don't take advantage. They pass when they should have shot and shoot when they should have passed. They wait too long and fire the puck into an opposing player's shinpads, often resulting in an odd-man rush against. Obviously, this is most evident on the powerplay, which the Flames haven't scored on for five straight games and have scored just three powerplay goals in their past eleven games. They had three prime opportunities to end the game with the man advantage and were unable to capitalize on them, which cost them the extra point.

Again, we all went into the season knowing that this team wasn't outrageously talented, but the inability to finish, with the man advantage when a point and sole possession of first place in the division is on the line, is unacceptable and needs to be rectified. Jarome Iginla is in the midst of a four-game pointless streak, and the Flames' secondary scoring has all but disappeared, with players like Dawes, Sjostrom, and Boyd (until tonight) experiencing lengthy droughts. I don't know if it's going to require something as simple as switching up the players on the first and second powerplay units, changing the strategy with the extra man, or acquiring a more creative forward, but it has to get better, especially with games against teams like the Penguins, Hawks, and Sharks coming up. This team's inability to finish is costing them points and wins, which become even more crucial as the season wears on and the division and conference standings become more highly contested.

I've said it before when this team has been struggling offensively, but that Ray Whitney deal which was supposedly close to fruition earlier this season may not be such a bad idea after all, especially if he scores goals like this, against Colorado to boot:

Think about it Darryl; for the sake of my (questionable) sanity.

Unrelated:

I hate Alex Burrows as much as the next Flames fan, but his shocking testimony of referee Stephane Auger's

pre-game threats and sub-sequent exaction (is that a word?) of revenge for previous grievances is a huge blow

to what little credibility NHL officials have left.

Up Next: The defending Stanley Cup champions are in town on Wednesday (7:30PM, TSN) for a game

which I have been begging for tickets to since before the Flames' schedule was announced. I will be living

vicariously through those of you in attendance.

Go Flames Go.

Second rule of pessimism: Things can only get worse

Need I say more?

The Flames lost again. As if the Holiday season wasn't depressing enough already.

Kiprusoff's Toskala-esque gaffe was only part of the problem tonight as the Flames were the victims of a 5-1 spanking at home against the Canucks, a team that they are supposedly "competing" with for top spot in the Northwest division. Despite taking the lead seven minutes into the first period on a nifty tip-in by Jarome Iginla, the Flames failed to incur any further damage, surrendering four unanswered goals in the first period before Kiprusoff was mercifully yanked and Curtis McElhinney was summoned from the bench to stop the bleeding. McElhinney stopped fourteen of the fifteen shots he faced in two periods of play. The Flames' failure to get off to a good start at home and stay out of the penalty box cost them in a game where second place in the division was on the line, against a team playing its second game in as many nights.

Once again, the Flames succumbed to pitiful offensive production and abysmal play in their own zone, and have squandered a healthy nine-point division lead to Mason Raymond and those shifty bastards from the West Coast. Maybe they were all just as incensed as Mikael Samuelsson upon hearing the news that he didn't make the Swedish Olympic team; I can't think of much else that would have brought on such an inspired performance, with the exception of the opportunity to overtake a divisional rival in the standings. Perhaps it all has something to do with this (or nothing at all, I was just looking for an excuse to work this video into my post and avoid going into further detail about a game I didn't watch):

That's Dion Phaneuf drunkenly rocking out to Billy Joel's "Piano Man" at a piano bar, apparently in Vegas, courtesy of TMZ. The guy in the white shirt is totally digging it, and the "Merry fucking Christmas" at the end really adds a nice touch. Stay classy, Dion.

I'm not about to get all ethical and over-analytical on you and claim that a twenty-four-year-old hockey player utilizing his notoriety and having a good time in Vegas is detrimental to the team and at the root of their recent struggles, but it can't be beneficial; especially since this team appears to have the character and mental fortitude of a cardboard box right now.

The Flames stumble into Edmonton tomorrow with about as much dignity as that annihilated-drunk girl at the party who just lost her virginity on the living room couch and then proceeded to vomit profusely. I'm all about the analogies this week.

Pride and a much-needed two points are on the line tomorrow night; the Oilers have lost six straight games while the Flames have lost six of their last seven. It's not as if Flames fans have had to endure an agonizing fall from grace or a seemingly endless parade to IR, but it's enough to get us feeling sorry for ourselves. We're in quite the tough spot here; we don't have a good enough team to expect consistent dominance and too much talent to accept constant losing. It's hard to imagine that things could get much worse for a team that was once again expected to make some noise in the West this season, but as far as the pessimist in me is concerned, they very well could. Every pessimist is really an optimist at heart who tries to suppress her expectations for fear of disappointment. Even though I knew the Flames were down 4-1 when I left the hotel, part of me hoped I would return to news of a 5-4 overtime victory for the good guys.

Second rule of pessimism: Things can only get worse.

I threatened to become an L.A. Kings fan tonight. It might just happen if I stay in California any longer.

Game time is 7PM on Sportsnet West. Get drunk and cry for me.

I've essentially given up on all superstitions at this point, so what the hell:

Go Flames Go.

PS: Misery loves company, so check out my Q&A with Oilers blogger Jay from Low on Oil here.

Merry freakin' Christmas

Okay, this whole losing business is getting a little out of hand.

Being that I am on vacation in California, I missed the Flames' last game before the Christmas break, a 2-1 shootout loss to the Blues on home ice. Needless to say, the game story spoke for itself. Eleven shots on goal through the first two periods, twenty-four altogether, a relatively easy night for Chris Mason, who stopped all but one--a screened semi-slapper from Gio off a faceoff win by Langkow. Six players had zero shots on goal. The Blues blocked a zillion shots and the Flames failed to establish much of a presence in the offensive zone, while a defensive miscue left Patrick Berglund uncovered in the slot, where he would score to give St. Louis the lead in the second period. This seems to have become the M.O. for the Flames in recent losses.

No one is surprised that the Calgary Flames are struggling to score goals. That was to be expected; you can't just replace a first-line, thirty-nine-goal-scoring winger with a bunch of ten-and-fifteen-goal scorers and expect the same results. What is surprising about this team is that they seem to lack the will to make anything happen offensively. I'm not talking about a few select players here, the whole damn team is stuck in this simultaneous goal-scoring rut, and it's real ugly. Everyone seems to have the confidence of a slightly overweight fifteen-year-old with braces and a bad haircut.

It's not that they aren't getting the shots--that I can live with if you bury your chances when you get them--but to miss the net ten times during a game seems ludicrous to me. Have the Sutters assembled a team of visually impaired, self-conscious teenagers with wonky sticks? Even the Sportsnet crew is picking up on the fact that the Flames shoot wide of the net a lot, and that's saying something. I know that teams sometimes shoot wide on purpose, in hopes of banking a shot off the end boards and cashing in on the juicy rebound in front of the net, but that is a set play that only works in certain rinks and if/when the bounces are going your way. I find it hard to believe that the Flames are purposefully miss-firing on this many potential shots. Shoot at the net, boys; it's that piece of mesh anchored by three red iron posts, you'll know it when you see it.

Missing the net is one thing, but the amount of scoring chances that the Flames "go-to" guys are missing on is unbelievable. 2-on-1 chances, breakaways, semi-breakaways, open nets...the list goes on. You're not going to get those chances every game, and when you do, you have to put them away. You can have the best defence in the league, but the team that scores the most goals always wins. The Flames seem to be learning that the hard way.

So how does one remedy the situation? Apparently, Brent Sutter thinks that putting Conroy, who has yet to score this season, on the first line (at right wing, no less, displacing Jarome Iginla from his natural position) will cure his team's offensive ills. Lord help us. Let's face it, Dawes and Moss are third line wingers on a contending team, not second liners to be counted upon to score goals every game. The Sutters seem to be in the business of collectively denying the organization's lack of offensive depth. It seems quite obvious that a trade for a top line winger would benefit this team, but Darryl is so stubborn that he refuses to acknowledge that the team he has put together is not good enough. That, or he has the patience of a saint. I'm not very hopeful that a deal will get done before the trade deadline, if at all.

This team is going to be in a lot of trouble if they can't get the top line going consistently or at least figure out how to "score by committee." Like many of the Flames' detractors have so eagerly pointed out, their skill and offensive prowess pales in comparison to that of true contenders like Pittsburgh, Washington, San Jose, and Chicago. However, teams like New Jersey operate on relatively limited offensive firepower and still manage to hold down eight spot in the league in terms of goals for and compete for first overall in the East. For more on the Flames' scoring struggles, check out this awesome piece by Kent over at M&G, he articulates the issue far better than I ever could.

Vancouver tomorrow.

The Flames begin a stretch of four games in five nights to close out 2009 tomorrow night at home. The Canucks have been relatively hot lately, and I think we can all agree that the Flames' two wins against them this season have been the result of worse-than-average performances by Luongo and a few lucky bounces. A 4-1 win against the Oilers tonight has brought them to within one point of the Flames, while the Avs and Wild also insist on winning on a regular basis. Again, I don't know what to expect from this team tomorrow. Are they going to come out inspired and ready to take on a divisional opponent, or slow and unprepared, failing to match Vancouver's tempo in the second half of back-to-back games for the 'Nucks? The pessimist in me suspects the latter, given the way this team responded against the Blues on Wednesday.

Game time is 6 PM on Sportsnet West. Ride the stress train for me.

A three-game losing streak would be the worst late Christmas present ever.

Post-game Party: The rocky road to redemption

Well we kicked the skid, although not with as much authority as I would have liked.

The Flames came storming out of the gate against the Kings at the 'Dome tonight, eager to set the tempo for what was a hard-fought, physical contest. Mark Giordano and Aaron Johnson were especially punishing on the blueline, as Giordano drew the ire of the Kings after dealing a series of solid jolts to their captain Dustin Brown, who was held to only one shot on goal and was visibly upset on the Kings bench. Brown attempted retaliation later in the game on a few hits that Gio managed to dodge, including an attempted elbow to the head that surely would have been reviewed by the league had it connected.

After a solid first period in which the Flames managed to kill off two straight Kings powerplays, they registered a powerplay goal of their own when Dion Phaneuf blasted a slapper through traffic with only 0.7 seconds left in the opening frame. The second period was essentially dead even, with each team firing eleven shots at the opposing 'tender. The third period is where things started to go downhill. After Nigel Dawes scored to put the Flames up 2-0 early in the final frame, the Kings took over. At one point, scoring chances were 9-3 in favour of L.A., and things started to get really sloppy at around the five minute mark.

After a couple good shifts in the offensive zone by the Kings during which the Flames failed to exit their zone after multiple opportunities, Robyn Regehr was dinged with an interference penalty. After a successful kill, the Flames iced the puck as Regehr stepped out of the box. A faceoff in the defensive zone led to more pressure from the Kings, and Corey Elkins shoveled home his first NHL tally to cut the Flames' lead in half. Thankfully, the Hockey Gods smiled down upon the Flames just minutes later, and presented them with a gift of a powerplay opportunity after an interference call on Justin Williams in front of the Flames net. Having already met their maximum powerplay goal-per-game quota of one, the Flames failed to generate any shots on the man advantage, and the Kings were back on the attack shortly thereafter.

During a rare shift in the Kings' zone, Williams struck again, this time clipping Public Enemy #1 Mark Giordano with a high stick with just over ninety-seconds remaining in the game. What followed resembled nothing remotely close to a powerplay, as the Kings set up shop once again in the Flames zone. With a minute remaining in the contest, Jay Bouwmeester, who has been average at best in recent games, took an idiotic cross-checking penalty after failing to clear the puck, resulting in one of the most stressful final minutes of a game in recent memory. After winning a faceoff to the right of Kiprusoff with 1.2 seconds left in the game, the Kings directed a final shot netward for a grand total of sixteen in the third period and thirty-five overall before the Flames managed to escape with the much-needed two-points.

This victory offers little comfort to Flames fans, as another incomplete and inconsistent game almost saw them squander a two-goal lead and fourty-five minutes worth of good hockey. Again, if it wasn't for Miikka Kiprusoff's MVP-like performance in goal, this game would likely have ended much differently. The inability of this team to exit and clear the zone cleanly remains a major area of concern and frustration, and to me, separates them from the elite teams in the league.

Watching a team like Pittsburgh, Chicago, or New Jersey play, it is enviable how quickly and smoothly their players exit the defensive zone, aided by crisp passes from defencemen to forwards. There is no getting hemmed in by the opposition, no scrambling around, no failing to get to loose pucks or getting outworked along the boards. These shortcomings have been painfully obvious lately, and what seemed to be one of their strong points in November is now an area in need of much improvement.

Adam Pardy's recovery from a sprained wrist helps to bolster the backend, I thought he had a pretty good game tonight, but the Flames as a group need to recommit to team defence. Allowing over thirty shots on goal every game, regardless of the ability of your goaltender, is irresponsible. If the Flames' team defence improves, the offence will surely follow. Taking a 2-0 lead early in the third might seem like justification to "take your foot of the gas," but not to the extent that you are getting outshot 16-3. Jarome Iginla and Nigel Dawes led the Flames with three shots a piece; the Kings? Doughty and Kopitar both had six while Justin Williams registered seven shots on goal, despite spending four minutes in the penalty box.

This is the second straight game where the effort of this club has fallen flat in the third period, only this time, they were up by two goals instead of tied. It reminds me of the beginning of the season, when the Flames were eking out wins based on the merits of twenty or fourty minute efforts. While the sense of "urgency" and tenacity that has been relatively absent over the duration of their now defunct three-game slide made an appearance tonight, the Flames still need to show a consistent commitment to the style of play that they know makes them successful and a tough team to play against.

In other news...

Thanks to kind-hearted Oilers blogger Jay from Low On Oil who has been spreading the word about my humble little blog, I have received an invitation to join the Bloguin Network as a Flames blogger (duh)! Needless to say I am honoured and extremely excited to join such a diverse and knowledgeable community of sports bloggers. It will likely take a month or more for the new site to be established, and in the meantime I am considering changing the name of this blog to something more Flames-related. So far, Jay has suggested "Fan the Flames," which I modified to "Fanning the Flames." I welcome your suggestions in the comments section, or feel free to send me an email at hazel.mutch@hotmail.com

Up Next: The Flames host the streaking Nashville Predators in a matinee game on Saturday. The Preds have won three straight and are a respectable 9-5-2 on the road; this game will be a tough test for a Flames team that hopes to get back on track before Christmas and has struggled to find consistency at home. By the way, what is the deal with Jamie Lundmark? Does anybody have the vaguest idea as to why the Flames have recalled him when there are no injuries plaguing the forward ranks that I'm aware of? It doesn't even appear on the team's website. He is just lurking about town with no intended purpose. Very odd indeed.